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Posts tagged ‘rethinking everything’

Successful then Happy or Happy then Successful?

A whole lotta folks talk about happiness being the goal of a good life. I am part of that camp. It feels awesome to be happy: when I’m happy I feel joy, relaxation, contentment, fulfillment, stimulation and in a state of flow all at the same time. When I am unhappy I feel anxiety, fear, anger or just in a quandary, unsettled. How to achieve this magnificent state of happiness? Read more

Mind Power

OK, so we all know about the power of the mind. We know about quantum physics and law of attraction, we know how Reiki masters can effect healing on the other side of the planet as easily as if they were laying their hands on someone. But do we REALLY know what our minds are capable of…. do we really? Read more

You Don’t Need to Be Happy For Me… I can do that for myself.

Growing through the snow

photo courtesy of Steve Hodgson


Last week we published a post about the importance of being selfish. The jist was that we deserve to be happy and to seek personal fulfillment. I mentioned that not everyone in our lives may agree and I’d like to elaborate. Just as we, ourselves, may be rethinking a life of obligation, unfulfilling work, and strained relationships, there are those who do not see a way or a need to change this traditionally accepted view of living. Being happy can be perceived as a personal affront to some people in our lives and downright crazy to others. Read more

Being Selfish Rules


I am so happy to have discovered a life of unmitigated selfishness. It’s not a recent discovery, and in fact I raised my kids to be completely selfish too … although honestly we never talked about it quite that way.

Living selfishly is pure bliss and everyone around you benefits from it. Contrary to what we have been culturally taught about being selfish, I’ve learned that it’s actually a secret to life. In fact it might even be the meaning to life. Some of you know just what I mean. For the rest of you, here is some insight on the magical, glorious selfish life. Read more

Get Ready for Rethinking Everything- PARENT!

2012 is upon us!

And so is the release of our very first magazine as Rethinking Everything Publishing.
Rethinking Everything Magazine, after two years of bold, edgy, exciting rethinking, has blossomed into three separate and distinct publications.

But you knew that, right?!

Rethinking Everything- PARENT   ::   publishes January 1st, April 1st, July 1st, and October 1st
Rethinking Everything- LIFE   ::   publishes February 1st, May 1st, August 1st, and November 1st
Rethinking Everything- SEX   ::   publishes March 1st, June 1st, September 1st, and December 1st

We are excited to offer them all absolutely FREE!


We’re ringing in the New Year with
                 beautiful pages that touch the soul and
                                FOUR stories bound to rock your world.

teresaTeresa Graham Brett of Parenting for Social Change brings us her personal story of recognizing the hypocrisy of traditional parenting and forging new relationships with children based in love, respect, and equality in Unlearning Adultism.
daynablogDayna Martin – world reknowned advocate for radical unschooling – shares private and powerful moments of life in a co-sleeping family in The Sacred Flow of the Family Bed.
inok resizeInok Alrutz paints the moment by moment memories of her bold, painful, emotional, empowering, and evocative journey into motherhood in Birth of a Universe.
LauraLaura Grace Weldon – blog maven, writer, farmer, and mom – kicks fear to the curb and hands the power of consequences to her kids in What the French Revolution Taught Me about Parenting.


Don’t miss it!
Subscribe now for FREE.

Have you shared us with your friends? Thank YOU!

Do you have a story? (We know you do.)

Do you know someone whose story inspires? (Yes.)

Let us know what you’re rethinking.  We’d love to work with you.





So we’re in the throes of the giving and receiving holiday:  what am I going to get, did I think of everyone, did I spend enough or too much, yada, yada.


You probably know by now that I love to feel good and I’m sticking to it.  What makes me feel wonderful and alive and clear and joyous, especially at this time of year, is giving.  Giving with absolutely zero thought of what I might be rewarded with in return.  Surprise giving is super fun and easy.

This year one of the things I loved doing was preparing a 25 day advent gift surprise for my kids, sending them a big box of individually wrapped goodies and special things, one for each day from December 1 – 25.  Since our family has given up gift giving completely over the last handful of years, this was a total surprise to them and it was fun for me because I got to use my imagination and revel in the fun they would have.  The best part of it for me was knowing that I would not receive any sort of present in return.  It’s just so much more fun to give!

Giving anonymously is also so gratifying, because it delivers the extreme pleasure of knowing the recipient will feel like there is a real Santa, wondering who gave them this gift and lapsing into the fantasy that gifts just drop out of sleds in the sky, right through the chimney.  I try to do as much of this as I can.  One of my favorite memories when my kids were in their early teens was this:  we all got wrapped up in this anonymous gift giving fantasy and chose two families for whom we made and shopped for unique gifts for each member.  We wrapped each gift in old timey Santa-like wrapping and put each family’s bundle of gifts in a big, handmade red velour Santa sack and tied each off with a big red satin bow.  We could hardly wait to secretly drop the bags off on their respective front porches in the middle of the night on Christmas Eve!  Honestly, I think we had more fun with this than the recipient families did because it was SO much fun.  In other years, sometimes we just choose dogs in the ‘hood to deliver anonymous dog toys to!

Gift box wrapped in gold paper
Photo courtesy of weddingmusings


I gladly gave up the wondering about what I would get several years ago- when I realized that I could have whatever, whenever (yes, we’re on a budget.  It’s a state of mind.).  Why wait until Christmas?  It felt forced and ridiculous to stockpile wishes for a single day of gluttony rather than feeling worthy any old day of the year.  And that’s when I really felt the burn to give.  GIVE.

I was just talking with a friend today about our desire to volunteer and help in virtually any capacity in a hands-on way.  I don’t want to donate to a telethon or send a few dollars a month to ‘adopt’ a child in Africa.  It’s just not the same.  And yet it is virtually impossible to find volunteer opportunities to which I can bring my children (who love to volunteer).

There were a couple of years that we chose a child or two’s lists from a community giving holiday tree and had a wonderful time shopping for the items on their list.  We’d imagine what they looked like and how much excitement or warmth (or both!) our purchases would bring them.

I was recently inspired by a friend’s Facebook post that she had bought a gift card at the register and asked the cashier to apply it to the purchase of the person behind her in line.  She was inspired to pay forward an act of kindness previously done unto her.  I thought, I can do that!  Then I started thinking about other ways of giving directly but anonymously.  It was refreshing to think that everyone delights in random acts of kindness and that I didn’t have to seek out organizations or people who meet a specific level of need.  Generosity feels amazing and is contagious.  It really gives us the much-needed perspective that we always have enough to share.  Have you seen The Long Way Down?  I am reminded of African families in their dirt floor huts out in the bush eagerly sharing their bits of food with Ewan McGregor and Charley Boorman.  No matter who you are, it feels good to give and share.

But one question often eats at me around the holidays – why not all year?  When I was young, little unexpected gifts showed up often in my shoes- whenever.  It was so magical.  My mother seemed just as amazed as I but I now suspect she was the anonymous giver… and loved every minute of it.

Rethinking Everything- PARENT

Rethinking Everything- LIFERethinking Everything- SEX

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RE Magazine- PARENT

REMagazine- LIFE

REMagazine- SEX

Talking with Kids About Sex… is a Crime?


I have been thinking, thinking, thinking about a story my husband recently told me about a new person – we’ll call him Bob – he met in his meditation class who has gone through a horrific experience I am having trouble making sense of.
Bob is a divorcee, having sought the separation from his wife due to their differences in sexual worldviews.  Bob enjoys monogamy and his ex-wife preferred a swinger lifestyle.  Bob tried it to please his wife but didn’t enjoy it.  Their feelings were strong enough on this that they separated.  Bob has a nine year old daughter who he shared custody with and she asked him after the divorce why he and her mom were no longer together.  He was honest and explained what the issue was.  Read more

Victims Struggle

I hear this word so often. People talk about how they struggle toward some accomplishment, struggle to communicate, struggle to improve and so on and on and on. Whenever I hear this word, my brain stops as I try to understand what it means. What do people mean when they say they struggle? I know that it feels difficult, but why are things difficult? I go through difficult times and situations often enough, but I just can’t relate to this word struggle. Help me out here. Read more